2019-04-29 - 10:08 a.m.
Major freak-out is happening right now...____________________
I am freaking the fuck out and I don't know what to do. I don't know who to talk to. I don't know where to go for help. The logical thing would be to ask Joe if we can talk but I'm so nervous.
I'm having a pretty massive panic attack right now. Waves of anxiety started about an hour or so ago. They dissipated for about 12 minutes while I watched a YouTube video that got me out of my head. Is this panic or is it withdrawal? That's something I could talk to Bob or MaryScott about. But I want to tell them after this is over.
I'm freaking out about rehearsal. Every little thing I could do today seems so daunting as to be impossible to start.
My skin is prickly and hot, my hands shakes sometimes. I can't focus.
Maybe it's both. Serves me right then.
Just wait it out. Hold on.
Hold on.
Don't drink.
Hold on.
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Afternoon entry: work better even though skies still gloomy, and a satisfyingly productive afternoon... - 2019-05-02We actually had a GOOD rehearsal. And I have so much more to say than I could include here... - 2019-05-02
Is there such a thing as a kind, open-hearted narcissist? - 2019-05-01
Tuesday morning's entry Monday night; tomorrow I'll sleep in a little... - 2019-04-29
Feeling better. Not great, but better. Thank God for Bob. Seriously. - 2019-04-29
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